Queer Community To Extend Acronym To Include Entire Alphabet

Forget LGBTQIA. Soon, the politically correct acronym for the Queer community will become ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ, the Human Rights Campaign announced yesterday.

William Gillespie, GLAAD spokesman, explains “We felt the former acronym was too limiting. Now, everyone can be a member of the Queer community.”

Proponents commend the new acronym for its all-inclusive nature. “It's great,” says Alcia Urbina. “I've been attracted to men, women, and everything in between and I never felt that I could define every aspect of my sexuality. Now, with the new acronym, I identify as Metasexual- the state of being attracted to sex itself. I'm glad that it allows me to embrace my free and fluid sexuality while being a part of the Queer community.”

Despite support for the addition, conservative religious groups have criticized the new acronym, arguing that it condones sexual deviance. “There should only be one letter, and that's 'G' for God,” attests John Tremblay, spokesman for C.L.O.S.E.T. (Christian League Of Serious Evangelical Talks).

Controversy aside, the Queer community has embraced the new acronym. As GLAAD President Herndon Graddick puts it, “It's sensitive, inclusive, and streamlined. No longer do we have to arrange the letters. If you can sing the alphabet, you can be sensitive to the Queer community.”